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July 1st. is a day of celebration and fireworks as Canadians celebrate the birth of our nation.  But for my husband and me this day will now also be a day of reflection and sadness as we move forward in life and marriage without our constant companion Winston, a 13 year old Vizsla (Hungarian Pointer).

I first met Winston when Keith would bring him to work at the Kerr Street Centre.  All the single ladies were talking about this handsome bachelor who had taken over as Operations Manager and would bring his well trained, gentle 60 pound bundle of constant joy into work with him.  I must confess that I attached to Winston easier than to Keith.  Of course to be fair to Keith, he was still reeling from the loss of Abby, Winston's half sister.  Abby had died of liver cancer just months earlier.  Since Keith had never married nor had children, these two dogs had been his life.

I learned that Winston never got over the loss of Abby so Keith was determined to keep him happy by bringing him to work as often as he could.  There wasn't a child or adult who didn't fall madly in love with Winston.  Dog lover's have no problem relating to this.  They understand how an animal actually becomes a part of your family.  Or should I say, we become part of the 'pack' that dogs naturally live in.  They are loyal, aim to please, learn tricks, hate being apart from us, always forgive and live totally in the moment.

It took about three years of casual friendship with Keith and Winston before the three of us became an item.  Winston fell in love with me and I believe I filled a hole in his heart with the loss of Abby.  The pack was complete again.  Winston totally approved of our marriage and was the happiest when we were together.  Anytime that Keith and I would take him for a walk and one of us would leave the pack to throw that little baggy of poop into a garbage can, Winston would stop in his tracks and watch both of us.  It was as if he couldn't stand to see us separate even for one minute.  He didn't want to make a choice of who to go with so he would simply stop in his tracks and watch both of us until we were walking together again.  Then he would happily go on his way and wander about as dogs do.

Winston would come for his bedtime story every night.  He couldn't jump up on the bed anymore but he still had to get his cuddles before he retired.  Winston would snuggle into my arm and wag his tail.  I would talk to him about the dreams he would have that night, the animals that he would be playing with or chasing after.  Once he got enough hugs and kisses, he would retire for the evening.  He would return to me in the morning to give me a report of his dreams the night before.  It was our little ritual.

Keith and I had only been married six months in 2007 when we found out that Winston had multiple herniated disks and a pinched nerve.  It appeared that he had suffered a stroke.  Because of his age, surgery wasn't recommended so we were prepared to have him put down.  Friends told us of an animal chiropractor who is actually licensed to work on dogs, cats and even horses.  With the incredible touch of his hands, Dr. Leo Rosenberg of Toronto worked a miracle and Winston was as good as new.  All he needed was a regular adjustment about every three or four weeks.  We were stunned at the results.  Dogs don't lie.  They either feel good or not and Winston was a happy puppy once again.  Time passed and things were good - for awhile.

A few months ago Winston began having urinary problems.  He was treated first for a possible infection but with no improvement.  Further testing revealed what no pet owner wants to hear.  I was in Alberta when Keith called me with the news.  Winston had bladder cancer and it had spread quickly to his urethra.  We were faced with preparing once again to say goodbye to our beloved companion.  The alternative option was to incur the high cost of chemotherapy.  

 I flew home early to be with Keith as he weighed all concerns including Winston's quality of life. Since it would be Keith's money paying for the treatment and Winston had been his dog for 11 1/2 years, it was only right that he make the decision.  The chemo would not eliminate the cancer but it would shrink it enough and extend Winston's life.  Keith opted to give Winston every chance to live.

There were no guarantees but we learned that results are better with animals than humans.  We humans can think negative thoughts but animals don't know anything about cancer.  As I mentioned, they either feel good or not but they don't know why.  That was encouraging to us.  Chemo treatments were scheduled for every 21 days for the next few months.  Additionally Winston would require a chemo capsule daily for the rest of his life.  All we could hope for was extending his life by possibly a year.  We weren't ready to say goodbye to our dear companion and he showed no signs of wanting to leave.

The decision was made.  The treatments began and the results were phenomenal especially given Winston's age.  We rarely left Winston alone more than 4-5 hours at a time.  We didn't want to stress his bladder and we knew that the additional year we were buying him would pass quickly.

I had just returned with Winston to rejoin my husband at our camping trailer in Lake George, New York.  Winston had undergone his latest round of chemotherapy and another chiropractic adjustment.  He would be good for another three weeks before having to return to Toronto, for further treatment.

Winston loved to carry his own leash and in doing so he loved to show off.  The leash was always folded carefully so it would fit nicely in his mouth and hang equally from either side.  We would walk the main street of Lake George in the cool of the evening and watch proudly as Winston became the focus of attention.  He seemed to know that people were watching him.  I mean everyone would see him trotting along just a few feet in front of us and would remark, 'hey, look at that dog, he's walking himself'.  Children would laugh and clap their hands with glee or point him out to their parents.  Winston was such a show-off.  On the sidewalk at least, he did stop traffic. 

We had a good weekend together.  Winston loved the trailer.  I'm sure he felt that we were in his 'dog house'.  Nice and cozy and always in eyesight of each other.  We had no way of knowing that would all come to an end on Tuesday morning July 1st.

When Winston got off the couch that morning he fell onto his hind legs.  We thought that he might just need a stretch and he would be OK.  However, he fell seven or eight times within one hour and we knew something was very wrong.  He couldn't control his hind legs and we were sure that he would hurt himself if he hadn't already.  The obvious became so.  That pinched nerve in his spine was no longer able to clearly pass messages from the brain to his rear leg.

Keith was so brave as he said he wanted me to return to Ontario as planned and he would take Winston to the vet to put him down in the next day or so.  He wanted to spare me the pain.  For me it was important that we share this experience together.  Why should one of us have to carry this painful memory alone?  Besides I needed closure if this was to be the time to lose this dear and precious loved one.  I also wanted Winston to be happy to his very last moment. As long as we were together, he wouldn't suspect anything.

Keith made the decision that it was time to say goodbye to our dear friend.  We drove in silence to our vet in Queensbury, about 30 minutes from our trailer.  Winston was in the back seat enjoying his car ride.  Again, unless you've invited a dog into your home to be part of your family, you have no idea the pain.  It's almost like losing a child.  Only dogs can wrap themselves so tightly around one's heart, it's hard to let go.  They are truly a gift from God and well deserving of the title 'man's best friend'.

We were able to sit in the grass behind the clinic under a tree and not have to take Winston inside.  Only minutes earlier, he had to have his last poop!  Keith would have to pick up one more bag.  We sat on grass under that tree holding and talking to Winston.  The vet inserted the needle and it was literally over in a split second!  He never knew what hit him.  That was it.  Keith and I lost it.  We both cried and kept petting our beautiful friend.  The vet left us alone for awhile to say our goodbyes.  We had Winston cremated so we could have his ashes.

Winston, we love you and will always miss you.  We will never get over you but will learn to live with all the beautiful memories that you gave us.  You never once brought shame or embarrassment to us but only delight and pride.  Canada Day is now also Winston Day for the Turner family.

I have often been asked 'Do dogs go to heaven?"  My answer is-if we want them to be in heaven, then I believe they will be there.  After all, Revelations talks about animals all around the throne of God; the lion laying down with the lamb.  If God loves animals so much that He is surrounded by angels, saints AND animals, why wouldn't He want us to be surrounded by our loved ones and our pets too?

It seems perfectly logical to me that Keith and I will see Abby and Winston again.  They will be part of the party waiting to receive us into glory.